I had an aim to be “the good wife” while I was on my sabbatical. What was my definition of “the good wife”? Well since I wasn’t working, I wanted to cook three meals a day, do all the shopping, cleaning, washing and ironing. I thought that would be a nice thing to do, since I wanted a 6-12 month break from work. I wanted to get into some good habits, while I could, before I went back into the workforce. I always remember my grandma’s horrified look when she saw one of my hubbie’s polo shirts and how creased it was; she even offered to iron it! It always stuck in my head that I wasn’t doing all I could. Oh and of course I wanted to have a huge welcoming smile on my face, with a bourbon and coke in hand, when hubbie got home from work – yeah right!?!
Not that I wasn’t “the good wife” while I was working, I just didn’t have time for all of the housework. Most nights I didn’t even have the energy to cook dinner. When you are working a 12 hour day 6 days a week, and trying to get enough sleep; trying to spend time with your husband; even trying to have a social life; and god forbid find time to do things you like e.g. cake decorating, something has to give. So it was housework and exercise that was sacrificed.
I envisioned cooking three meals a day and catching up on all the cleaning (the bathroom had gotten pretty bad), as well as ticking off the 30+ items on my to-do list! We started the Dukan Diet and did really well on it. However I was still having issues with my stomach, so needed to try something else. Some friends my recall the naturopath put me on a low allergy diet, which pretty much meant I was allowed to eat rice and veggies, and fish or chicken twice a week! Now I was trying to be “the good wife”, and anyone that knows my hubbie, knows that he needs meat! So that didn’t last very long. However I have worked out I am seafood and lactose intolerant, which sucks because seafood is yummy! And milk coffees are even yummier!!!
I also started finding that I just didn’t have as much time to do my crafty things, nor cross things off my list as I wanted to. It didn’t help that we had a lot of visitors for those first few months of my sabbatical – I got extremely sick of washing linen! So it didn’t take me long to stop cooking three meals a day and trying to keep all the washing, ironing and cleaning up to date because it was just taking up too much of my time. Which I do feel a little guilty about. Saying that though, since I stopped working hubbie has seemed to stop doing all the little jobs he used to! He’ll still cook dinner a couple of times a week (when he realises I am not and he’s hungry) and do the dishwasher on occasion (because he has no room to cook dinner!). So I pretty much said “stuff this” and stopped making cleaning etc a priority!
I found out a couple of months ago that my husband (yes not hubbie right now!) tried to order a book for me at the beginning of my sabbatical… called something along the lines of “Good Wife’s Guide”. I hadn’t shared my aim about being “the good wife” with him and if he had given me this book I think it may have been rammed somewhere a book doesn’t belong! But it is a little funny that we had thought similar things
So I wanted to say a few things. I think husbands should be a little more grateful for the housekeeping etc that their wives do. I am not saying that all men fall in this category, but I am sure there are some out there that do think that their wives have time to sit in front of the TV and/or craft all day. I also know that there are a lot of males out there that do “boy cleaning”… which means that the wife just has to re-do it… I don’t understand why men don’t put their muscles to work when cleaning. I asked my hubbie this once and he truthfully said “because I don’t want to do it”… Well you know what? Neither do I!!!
Next thing, I would like to take my hat off to mothers, whether single or partnered. I have one hubbie and two dogs and I can’t keep up. So mothers are A M A Z I N G !!!! I hope you know that. And I hope your children do too!!!
And for all those people that thought I would be bored not working, well I have actually found that I am not sure how I previously had time to work! A couple of my aunties and uncles have retired recently and think the same! So they know where I am coming from. One even told my Dad that he’s too busy to find time to read my blog! He’s retired! What is he doing with his time? LOL! He is living!
So I am still going to be “the good wife”, but I think I will do this by cooking most of hubbie’s meals, ensuring he has clean clothes and a bag for the ironing lady every second week! And making sure I spend time with him, whether it’s watching The Newsroom or The West Wing for the 86th time, having a spa with him, or going for our evening walks with the pups! And of course love him and live life to the fullest with him! What else should a wifey really do to be “the good wife”?